Monday, 25 March 2013

Short review: Arachnoquake

Director: Griff Furst
(2012)

Even for a SyFy original movie, my standards were still monumentally low for Arachnoquake, a film even more stupid than it sounds. Set in New Orleans, It follows a bunch of bad characters played by talentless actors as the city suffers earthquakes that set loose a load of giant, fire breathing spiders. From here it’s an onslaught of poor acting, beyond terrible CGI, dozens of continuity errors and just plain awful filmmaking. The film lacks any form of logic, I mean, why go to a drug store to get an inhaler when you can use scuba gear instead? Soldier’s fire unloaded guns, baseball players hit spiders like a homerun (complete with cartoon sound effects) and everyone trips over logs that aren’t actually there, you know, for suspense. It’s laughably bad at best, and downright atrocious for the majority of the film. Avoid like a giant, fire breathing spider.



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